BBBC # 3 & 4

I missed yesterday’s  BBBC, mainly because my sleep pattern is totally messed up at the moment.  I’m just gonna go ahead and do 3 and 4 in the same post 😀

SL Bloggers – How hard do you think it is to find a relationship in SL? If you have an SL relationship, have you met in the physical world? Would you meet them? Do you think it would change your SL relationship if you met?

RL Bloggers – Would you start a relationship with someone you met online? Would you have a problem telling people that’s where you met? Do you think it’s easier to meet someone online rather than at work or at a club?

I fit in both criteria I think on this one.

I have never had a romantic relationship in SL. I don’t ever intend to, not that I ever have. I just don’t have much faith in SL’s ability as an internet dating system. It lacks the control I desire over who I would like to be able to contact me, and I do not want to have to ever, EVER deal with pixel sex. Ever.

The only love I have found in SL is the friendship kind. I met my best friend on SL, and she’s so very important to me. I would freakin’ LOVE to meet her, and I doubt it would change a thing. The thing about us, is we’re the same in both SL and RL, which is something that gets in the way of all relationships in SL. If you can’t be honest with each other about who you are, it’s really not fair to ever meet, because your expectations will be too high, and it will completely mess up the fantasy relationship you have built.

I have met plenty of past partners in RL over the internet. It is easy, too easy. I met my fiancée on OKCupid. We were a 99% match. Once I re-answered a question, we were 100%. Neither of us is ashamed of where we met, we would never have met otherwise, he lived about 45 minutes away and I lacked any social skills of note at the time.

I don’t think the internet is necessarily easier to meet people, but it offers those of us with lesser social skills and anxieties about people and public places, to be able to be social, without the stress. It means more people are out there on the internet, looking for love, or friendship, or just someone to talk to.

SL Bloggers – Is your avatar more or less your current biological age? Do you portray a younger avatar, or older? Why is this?

RL Bloggers – Do you lie about your age? Do you think you act your age? Are you where you thought you’d be at your current age?

My avatar is me. I don’t roleplay, or anything like that. I am the same shape and height in SL, as I am in RL too.  I don’t lie about my age on SL, or RL. I should resist the urge to rant on this, but it’s 4am and I really wish people would quit lying to others. Lying about your age is a serious problem. If you can’t be honest to people you care about, then you’re not being honest with yourself, which is probably part of the problem.

I wouldn’t say I act my age. Until recently, I was reluctant to grow up. I realised I am 23, a year older than my Mum was when she had me, and I was scared. I didn’t want what she has now, not the way she has it. She has 5 children. She is depressed, and broke, and stresses like no other. I didn’t want to grow up and face reality, because as far as I knew, adulthood was nothing but stress and misery.

How wrong I was.

Acting my age is subjective or something. I know when to put my grown up face on and deal with life’s little problems, but at the same time, I refuse to give up the happiness. I will forever be the joker with my friends and family. I will forever be the funny girl, and that is fine with me.

I’m not where I expected to be at my age, when I was younger, only because if you asked me 10 years ago, you wouldn’t have got a pleasant answer – I was dealing with depression and a lot of family stress at the time, and struggled with self harm and suicide.

I am not even where my family expected me to be, they expected me to get pregnant at 16, and live a life of misery and poverty, like all the other chavvy inbred girls in my home town. I think they’re still shocked now.


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